For many people, adoption is a fairly unknown topic. They may have heard stories from friends or family members or seen adoption portrayed in movies or television. However, it can feel very different when a family member announces that they are adopting, especially if they are pursuing embryo adoption, a lesser-known form of adoption.
Questions will naturally come up, and perhaps the most important one is: “What is the best way to support them on this journey?” It can feel difficult when you genuinely want to help but are unsure where to begin.
Here are three tips to keep in mind when supporting extended family members who are pursuing embryo adoption.
1. Be mindful of the questions you ask.
Even well-intentioned questions can sometimes come across as hurtful or offensive. As you learn more about embryo adoption, you may feel inclined to ask, “Have you tried IVF or other fertility treatments?” While this question often comes from a place of love and a desire to help, it can be deeply painful for embryo adoptive parents.
For many couples, choosing embryo adoption is an emotional decision that may come after years of infertility struggles or multiple fertility treatments. This does not mean you need to avoid asking questions altogether, but it is important to be thoughtful about your wording and sensitive in your approach.
2. Be open to learning more about embryo adoption.
The prospective adoptive parents may want to share educational resources or information they receive throughout the process so you can learn alongside them. Try to be receptive to what they share. They may also introduce you to more positive adoption language and help normalize conversations around adoption within the family.
Being open to learning, and even taking the initiative to do your own research, can show them that you genuinely care and want to support them throughout their journey.
3. Be there for them.
As mentioned earlier, embryo adoption can be an incredibly emotional journey. Sometimes, support can look very practical, such as offering to watch their pets while they travel for a transfer or preparing a meal for them when they return home. It could even be something as simple as bringing them an ice cream treat during the waiting period between the transfer and pregnancy test.
Other times, support may come in the form of praying for them, checking in, or simply letting them know you are thinking about them. Even small gestures can go a long way in helping them feel loved and supported.
When you first learn that an extended family member is pursuing embryo adoption, you may want to jump in and support them right away but feel uncertain about the best approach. By asking thoughtful questions, remaining open to learning more about the adoption journey, and showing them consistent care and support, you can make a meaningful difference.
These steps can strengthen your relationship with the adoptive parents while also helping create openness and understanding around embryo adoption for the beautiful children who will become part of your family.
To learn more about embryo adoption and donation resources, visit EmbryoAdoption.org.
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