Building a family does not always go as planned. It can be frustrating; with many decisions and choices to navigate while you also may be grieving your infertility. One key decision is determining what is best for you, and with there being so many choices and paths you can take when looking to build your family, we are going to focus in and look at the options and differences of embryo adoption or egg donation.
Should you use donated human eggs to create embryos, or opt for embryos donated by families who have already completed their family-building journey?
Let’s look at the similarities and differences of these options and hopefully guide your decision making process.
Egg Donation
For many years, egg donation has been a common, though costly, option for couples dealing with low ovarian reserve, poor egg quality, or unexplained fertility issues.
In order to find a donor egg, you can go to either a fertility clinic or an egg donor agency to choose an anonymous egg donor. (If you have a family member or friend who is willing to donate their eggs, that is also an option you can choose.)
The ideal egg donor is someone who is under the age of 35 and has no history of infertility. When you are choosing your donor egg, you also have to think about whether you want fresh or frozen donor eggs. Fresh donor eggs are typically going to be more expensive and have the added factor of having to coordinate the donor’s cycle with the recipient’s cycle, since the egg needs to be fertilized and transferred right away. With frozen eggs, this is going to be the more cost effective option and you have more flexibility with the timeline since you only have to focus on the recipient’s cycle.
Prior to using the donated eggs in an IVF cycle, you will need to involve a lawyer and have contracts signed that explicitly state that the egg donor waives all rights to the children born from the donor eggs.
This is a very crucial step to protect yourself and your family. Some fertility clinics may recommend or require that you and your partner participate in counseling prior to pregnancy. This is to address the emotions that can go along with using an egg donor and help you be aware of what may arise throughout the process. From there, you would go through the IVF process using the donor egg and your partner’s (or a donor’s) sperm to create the embryo. The hope for that embryo is that it implants and grows into a healthy baby. As you grow and nurture that baby in utero, you are able to control the prenatal environment and care for their wellbeing as they develop.
You may be wondering: how much does something like this cost? The cost can vary based on a plethora of factors including: whether you are using fresh or frozen eggs, where you live, what clinic you are using, if you have to go through more than one IVF cycle, the cost of legal fees, etc. However, it is estimated that the cost of using a donor egg for an IVF cycle can range from about $35,000 to $65,000.
One additional important factor to consider is the opportunity for any children who result from the creation of embryos with donor eggs to have contact with, or learn any personal details about, the egg donor. Unless you are using a known donor, it is very unlikely that this will be possible, as any egg donations through a clinic or other facility are anonymous. You will generally receive a photo, health history, and some autobiographical information, but your child or children will not have the opportunity for any communication, much less a relationship, with their genetic parent.
Embryo Adoption
A more recent option for building your family and something that many people are just starting to hear about is embryo adoption.
In 1997, a new alternative to egg donation became available through the Snowflakes Embryo Adoption Program. Embryo adoption allows adoptive parents to use embryos that remain from another person’s IVF treatments, giving them a chance to pursue pregnancy without the need to create new embryos or purchase expensive donor eggs.
Families that are choosing to donate their embryos have already completed their family and are wanting to find a loving home for their remaining embryos. Embryo adoption gives the placing family the opportunity to remain in contact with the adoptive family and they can know that the children born from the embryos they donated are loved and well cared for. Both the placing and adoptive family can choose what level of communication they are comfortable with and they are presented with matches based on these communication preferences, as well as other factors. Both families have final say as to whether they agree to a match and once a match is agreed upon, the families will work on the legal contracts that are needed.
Similar to egg donation, there is a legal aspect to embryo adoption, as ownership of the embryos is changing, in most cases, from the donating family to the adoptive family.
With many embryo adoption programs, you may have to find your own legal representation; however, with some programs, all legal and attorney logistics are handled by the program.
Once the legal side of things is completed, the embryos are either shipped to the clinic of the adoptive family, or the adoptive family can go to the clinic where the frozen embryos are being stored. Either way, the embryos are eggs that have already been fertilized, so unlike with egg donation, all that is left is the frozen embryo transfer. The adoptive mother’s cycle is all that has to be taken into account with the frozen embryo transfer and the hope is that the embryo will implant and the adoptive mother will have a healthy pregnancy. Similar to egg donation, with embryo adoption, the baby is carried by the adoptive mother, which allows her to control the prenatal environment of the child. Along with this and the opportunity for the adoptive mother to experience pregnancy, another benefit of using an embryo adoption program like Snowflakes is that adopting parents have the opportunity for ongoing communication and a relationship with the placing family. Research has shown that this is beneficial not only for the adopted child, but for the placing and adopting families, as well.
Much like egg donation, there are variable costs when it comes to embryo adoption, but the total cost of embryo adoption ranges from about $12,000 to $16,000, which is significantly lower than egg donation.
Some of the variables that can determine the total cost include which embryo adoption program you choose, the cost of a home study, and the amount your clinic charges for a frozen embryo transfer. The estimated price range for a frozen embryo transfer is anywhere from $3,500 to $7,000 depending on your clinic. While some insurance companies will cover frozen embryo transfers, insurance companies will not cover the cost of adoption at this time. However, adoption agencies may offer help on how to fundraise or apply for grants, which will help cover the cost of the embryo adoption process. It is important to talk to your embryo adoption agency about this as you are collecting information.
Both egg donation and embryo adoption have helped thousands of couples across the United States achieve healthy pregnancies. While egg donation is more widely known, embryo adoption might be the answer some families struggling with infertility have been looking for and is a lower cost option that allows the opportunity for ongoing communication between the parties if desired.
To learn more about embryo adoption and donation, visit EmbryoAdoption.org.
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