If you are in the early stages of a divorce, in the middle of navigating the process, or finalizing the last details, our deepest condolences go out to you and your family.
No matter the reason behind a divorce, whether it was a mutual decision or the result of painful circumstances, it is an emotionally complex and often exhausting path. Amid the many decisions and agreements that need to be made, one question that frequently arises for couples who have done IVF is what to do with any embryos remaining in frozen storage.
Many couples reach this moment only to realize that they never discussed a plan should divorce occur. This can create challenging situations, some of which have gained widespread media attention in recent years.
You invested significant time, resources, and hope into creating these embryos with the intention of building your family. If you did not use all (or any) of them before your family plans changed, the thought of these embryos may stir complicated emotions. Yet there is also another perspective to consider: together, you and your former spouse created something that still holds potential for good. Through embryo donation, you can offer another family the opportunity to experience the joy, hope, and blessing of parenthood, something they may not be able to achieve on their own.
If you believe embryo donation may be the right choice for your remaining embryos, here are the steps to guide you forward:
1. Choose a reputable embryo adoption or clinic donation program.
Working with an experienced embryo adoption or donation program can make the process far smoother than attempting to manage it on your own or solely through an attorney. Couples who are divorcing or recently divorced have additional documentation and requirements to complete, and a dedicated program can help you navigate these steps with clarity.
2. Ensure both partners agree to the decision and complete all required steps.
Each program’s requirements will differ, but at a minimum both individuals will need to complete applications or agreements, provide detailed health histories, and undergo updated FDA-required donor blood testing.
3. Decide which partner will become the sole legal owner of the embryos.
Designating one legal owner helps streamline the donation process and reduces delays. This allows the program to communicate with a single individual rather than coordinating between two former partners.
Note: If your divorce is not yet finalized, reviewing the steps above may help you prepare for what will be expected of each of you during the donation process.
Divorce, whether the result of gradual separation or difficult circumstances, is undeniably painful. However, with clear information and a thoughtful plan, determining the future of your remaining embryos can become one less burden during an already challenging season.
To learn more about embryo donation and your options, visit EmbryoAdoption.org.
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