Embryo Donors: Waiting for a Match

You have remaining embryos and have wrestled with the idea of what to do with them for quite some time.

You decide to donate your embryos through a third-party embryo adoption program. You go through the rigorous application process and are finally ready to match with a recipient family with excited anticipation, certain you receive communication any day about a potential match.

But that communication never comes. Maybe months, or even a year or two goes by and there still has not been any potential matches. It is easy to get discouraged at this point, but there are some practical steps to take to find your match quicker:

Look at your preferences

The more open-hearted and open-minded you are, the easier it will be for a match to come! If you are restrictive about the ages of the recipient family, education level, how many children are in the home, etc., the more difficult it will be to find a match for your embryos.

Communication preferences

While not every recipient family is interested in direct communication, many are attracted to certain third-party embryo adoption programs because communication between donor and recipient families is more doable. Recipient families love the opportunity to grown relationships organically with their embryo donor families. Consider opening up your communication preferences—you never know what amazing recipient family is out there that you will blessed with communication!

Maybe it is time to let go…

Have you declined multiple matches? Sometimes, it can be difficult to distinguish between the anxiety of letting go and the feeling that it is “not the right match.” If you truly do not feel peace about a recipient family, then they are not the right match! If you feel like they are a good family, but you are having a hard time saying yes, that is very normal. Embrace those feelings! This is not an easy decision, and it is going to be filled with emotions you have probably not processed before and decisions you never thought you would have to make.

Stay encouraged! Trust the process

This may be the most challenging part. Waiting is never easy, but it is what helps us mature. Trusting and patience helps mold character, grow our perseverance, and teaches us that everything happens in the perfect timing. All these dynamics will help you make the right decision when your recipient family comes along.

To learn more about where you can start the process of donating your remaining embryos, visit EmbyroAdoption.org.