Many embryo adoptions are done using an open adoption format. That means the families have the option of staying in contact with each other as the child grows up, and the child has the opportunity to meet their biological family in the future if they wish. Both families will be able to set guidelines for communication, which can range from an update once a year through the adoption agency to weekly phone calls, or even vacationing together. So how do you determine healthy boundaries for your open adoption?
The short answer is that a healthy boundary is one that makes you feel comfortable. The agency that you work with will help both the adopting family and the donating family work through an open adoption agreement. This agreement will lay out the kind of communication you want with the other family, how many visits are allowed, when those visits are allowed, and how you want to exchange letters and photos. You’ll also want to consider things like how to handle social media and whether or not gifts are welcome during birthdays and holidays. Keep in mind that communication agreements may change in the future as the child gets older.
Open adoption can seem intimidating for both families at first, but as time goes by, most families find that the benefits far outweigh the concerns. Many even find that they welcome more communication as time goes by! You can learn more about open embryo adoptions and read stories from families using the open adoption format by visiting www.embryoadoption.org.
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