The following is written by Lindsay Alford and edited by the Awareness Center for the purpose of this blog. 

I was deeply touched by an old episode of Private Practice. Dr. Amelia Shepherd gave birth to a brainless baby and was forced to make a heart wrenching decision to donate her baby’s organs, or to let him die naturally. Her decision to donate all of her baby’s organs to families across the country struck an ethical debate among her colleagues. She understood that what she was asking was unimaginable. But she asks anyway because she did some research on all the children that her baby could save. She wasn’t ready to give her baby up, but heroically found the strength to allow the transplant team to proceed.

My story began seven years ago when I gave Rick Alford my forever. During the infancy of our relationship, as with most couples, Rick and I explored each other’s hopes and dreams. Neither of us desired anything out of the ordinary, I wanted to get married and have children, Rick wanted to return to his home state of Virginia. Little did we know, these simple dreams would lead to major challenges and test the best of relationships.

Today my heart is beating fast and my emotions are raw. Like Dr. Amelia Shepherd in Private Practice, my husband and I were faced with a life changing decision. Six intrauterine inseminations (IUI), a laparoscopic surgery, heavy fertility drugs, two specialists, an in vitro fertilization (IVF) and four years later, we were blessed with two beautiful baby girls, Olivia Rose (Liv) and Amelia Hall (Mia).
So what’s the dilemma?

After we transferred two fresh embryos, we froze our three remaining embryos. We had lengthy discussions as to how it would be financially irresponsible of us to have more children and we owe it to Liv and Mia to give them the best life possible. We were given three choices: keep the embryos frozen, destroy them, or give them up for adoption. When I laid my head on my pillow at night, I knew I couldn’t destroy them. Even though I’m pro-choice, for me, it felt like an abortion. Rick pictured the embryos in the petri dish screaming for a fighting chance. All of our embryos were high quality so it was pure luck Liv and Mia were chosen. So we ruled out the first two choices and that left us with adoption.

Stay tuned for part two of Lindsay’s embryo donation decision next Friday.

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